Humor - It's a Vivas Thing!

Jul 06 2009

My Dear Friend, Boots

I've been at camp for a week with our teenagers. I thought I'd find some free time today to share just how amazing these teens are, but God has other plans for today. You see, this morning, my dear friend, Boots, went to be with Our Lord and Savior. She is at peace; she is healed, she is happy. But we will miss her so much. I thought I would share what she meant to us.

I met Boots 14 years ago. B-boo was just a baby and we were at the baby shower of another friend. Boots was sitting beside me and we just kind of hit it off. Over the years our friendship became so much more than just friends. She was twice my age, but she was awesome. Her home was always open and she loved to be around my family.

I remember swimming at her home one time. My youngest daughter didn't even know how to swim yet, she must have been about a year old; old enough to be walking around. She was a brave child; still is. She'd just jump right into that pool and we'd pray she wouldn't drown! Boots had a life vest thing that we put on her. When the Drama Queen saw the little tykes slide, she was in heaven! She'd slide down that thing right into the pool. A few times she jumped off of it. She terrified us, but Boots loved it! In many ways, I think Boots must have seen some of the Drama Queen in herself.

Another time, when B-Boo was about 4 years old, she snuck into their car and would not get out. She was bound and determined to go home with Mr. Boots, as he was and still is fondly called.

My friend and I used to take Boots out for lunch. We'd laugh fondly as we shoved her hiney up into my big ole conversion van. After a while, we had to take my friend's mini-van instead, but those shoves left fond memories of Boots permanently implanted in our minds. Just this weekend, we were talking about shoving her in for another lunch. We love her.

Boots' eyes were failing near the end and she couldn't tell which kid was which, but she knew they were one of mine.

I loved to hear from her, to hear her talk with that attitude of hers. She was not one that would take no for an answer and she was what we fondly called, "ornery!"

Last week, she asked me when was I going to bring the kids swimming. I told her we'd come after our vacation in July. I wish I'd just gone. We'll not have the chance again.

As I sat with my friend and Mr. Boots this morning, I thought about the last time we were there. It was in May, at our D-now weekend. Boots sat in that same chair as myself and a few of the teens gathered around her and prayed for her. I didn't know that would be the last time I'd visit her in her home. This morning, we gathered around Mr. Boots as we remembered her.

She was a special lady and we will miss her so much…and while are hearts are broken here on earth, we praise God that she is up in Heaven feeling no more pain; playing the piano and singing with the angels, perhaps even dancing.

Jun 25 2009

My Kids Think I’m Supermom!

My family thinks I'm supermom. They do. I guess I never really realized it. I mean, my husband will joke around and call me SuperMom, but that's just a joke, right?

This week has kind of been an eye opener for me. Maybe my kids expect so much from me because I've taught them that I can handle it. I can take whatever is thrown at me. I'm a pretty confident person. I know what I want and I'm usually pretty confident that I can handle things. I am for the fair and the just; the underdog. If someone asks something of me, I'll do my best to help. I love to help others. I can't help that I like to help, I just do.

I think this is a good thing. My kids arent' afraid to come to us in the middle of the night with a problem, or a friend's problem, and ask us to help; because they know we will.

I'm seeing more and more that my kids are starting to show some of these traits. But I never really realized how they see me.

Earlier this week we had family lunch. I had a coupon. It was Father's Day. I showed the coupon to the waiter who gave it to the manager. The fine print said not for holidays. It was Father's Day; they would not honor the coupon. We've had not one, but three family celebrations at this restaurant in the past month. I have a big family. I was not happy. I had another coupon at home. The manager said she would have honored that one, but I chose to bring this wrong one. I was nice, but not real thrilled. So, she said she'd give us a 10% discount instead of the 20%…and she kept my coupon! My oldest son asked me what had happened and so I told him. I told him that I appreciated the smaller discount but I thought I should have been able to keep my coupon since it was not honored. He was shocked that I didn't have it. He said he remembered one time that I was fighting for justice in the world and I sent him to the car with one of his siblings. When I came out, he asked me what had happened, and he said my reply was, "I got what I wanted."

I don't remember that, but apparently he does. When the waiter came, my son showed off his talents. He was so nice, my adult son. He thanked the waiter for serving us today and asked him to please bring back our coupon that we were not allowed to use. The waiter explained that the manager had given us a discount. My son again thanked him, agreed with him, and then explained to him that we did not however, get to use our coupon and since it is not expired, we'd like it back to perhaps use another time. He was so nice, but you could tell he was not going to take no for an answer. A few minutes later, the waiter brought back my coupon and my son gave it to me. A chip off the old block. I've never seen me in action, so it was kind of fun to watch.

Maybe it comes from my retailer days. I don't know. If I have a coupon without an expiration date, well then, I think it should be honored. It's not my fault the company didn't put an expiration date on the coupon now is it? And if I take the time to travel to a store for that discount, then common courtesy says they should honor it.

I love coupons. I've been known to walk into a store and tell someone I have this type of coupon and you have this type of sale. Can you help me get the most for my money? And they do.

Cell phone. I pay for a warranty for my cell phone. If it breaks, I do not want to keep getting broken, refurbished phones. I'll accept them for a while, but after three times, I'm thinking I'd better just get a new phone. I mean, it's not my fault the technicians don't make sure the phones are completely fixed before giving them to the next customer now, is it? And, if it's not my fault that the phone keeps breaking, so when I finally get a new phone because their technicians don't know what they are doing…well, I don't think I should have to extend my contract either. I mean, fair is fair. I paid for a phone that works and that is what I would like to have. Seems simple enough.

I had a friend tell me one time that when I directed Vacation Bible School at our church she'd plan to say no when I called recruiting. Then, she'd hear my voice and say yes. ha ha

Something broken? Before we buy a new one, let's see if we can fix it.

Want to have a party? Let's plan one!

6 Kids, one mom…I'll try my best to handle it! Delegation and organization is the key…but SuperMom is the thought.

And I have SuperDad to back me up.

SuperMom requirements include:

Able to jump out of a plane for an 18th birthday!

Able to make dinner out of almost nothing, with almost no notice!

Able to fix boo boo's at a moment's notice!

Able to drop anything at a moment's notice and switch gears just as quickly!

Able to have eyes in the back of her head.

Able to drive a stick, hold a towel to a bleeding child's head as we rush to the hospital and call for help for those I've left behind.

Able to stay up all night with a sick child and still function the next day.

Able to get several children to several different places; all at the same time!

Able to hold a 7 ft python without screaming.

Able to…well, you get the picture.

Last night, B-boo and I were talking about camp. She wants to try all the activities that they offer. I told her I signed the paper so that she could do it all if she wanted. Her reply?

"Mom, is that an everybody thing, or a Hope Vivas thing?"

I guess I have made an impression. ha ha

Jun 22 2009

Laughable Moment #14

On Father's Day we went out to lunch. When we got around to ordering, the Talented One asked my nephew what it was he wanted to eat. The conversation went something like this:

"What do you want to eat?"

"I want chicken butt."

Shocked, the reply was, "You want chicken nuggets?"

"No, I want chicken butt."

"You want a taco?"

"No, I want chicken butt."

"There is no chicken butt."

"Yes there is. I want chicken butt."

We tried hard, amid the fits of laughter, to convince him that there was no such thing as chicken butt. We have no idea where he got it from. If he's said Elephant brains, well, that would be us warping his young brain…but chicken butt? Nope..we aren't to blame for that one!

We finally convinced him to have a taco. Then he changed it to a cheeseburger. We told him no more changes. When the waiter came to take the order, he proudly told the waiter what he wanted to order.

"I want chicken butt!"

"You want chicken nuggets?"

"No, I want chicken butt."

"Excuse me, he'll have a cheeseburger, thank you."

Jun 21 2009

My Dad

I was talking to my mom yesterday and she was telling me about a package that was delivered to Dad; for Father's Day. And it dawned on me, that for the first time, I'd let it slip that it was even Father's Day at all. No gift was sent, and I felt terrible. I'm sorry, Dad, I really am.

It dawned on me, that I am so consumed with all that is going on with my life, that me, Miss Organization, can't even remember what today is, let alone what is going on tomorrow. I have a calendar that is so full, it is color coded. You'd probably cry if you looked at it; I know sometimes I want to. There really isn't anything that can be taken off, it just is what it is. It is mostly filled up with doctor and counseling appointments. I've told my family that if it is not in writing on my calendar, it does not exist. Sometimes I feel like I need a t-shirt that says, "I'm a stay-at-home mom, and I have no life."

I don't really feel that way most of the time. I love my family. I love my children. I love my niece and nephew. But these days I find my brain disappearing and being replaced with slush. Last night, I was on the phone with my husband and told him that I was going to pick up our son. In the same conversation, I reminded my husband that my son needed his meds. My daughter looked at me like I was crazy and my husband started laughing at me…because I had just said I was going to pick him up; which meant he could not be home with my husband. And so now; I've forgotten a special day. And I'm all about special days. I love them; ask anyone who knows me and they'll tell you that I, Hope Vivas, am all about a reason to celebrate anything.

And I forgot my dad. And I feel terrible. He doesn't deserve that.

And then, I started thinking about Dad. And I couldn't stop. I thought, maybe, just maybe, he'd like to know what I really think about him. So, the rest of this blog is for my dad, because I love him so much. Dad, you probably have no idea how much I really adore you. I do.

One of my best memories is you taking us camping; every where, all the time. I loved going camping! I loved the soft ball games, and the campfires, and the roasted marshmallows. I loved it when you hid behind a tree and would growl like a bear. We knew it was you, but it still scared us anyway. And we loved that we were scared by your growling!

I love that you never ever made us feel like we wanted for anything. I can't remember a time of really wanting anything or being told no. We wanted to live in the country, we lived in the county. We wanted horses, we got them. Dirt bikes; we got them. There was never a want, because you worked so hard to provide our every dream to us. There were never any mansions, but that was ok, because you gave so much, we didn't need to dream of something bigger or better.

We lived a pretty simple life, but it was a wonderful life. Do you know what my favorite memory of you is? It is when we were playing in the snow on the round saucers. You and I went roaring down a hill lickety split! We went down so fast that we crashed into the bank. Up into the air we went flying, with you landing in the street and me on top of you. And we laughed so hard. I think of that often. That is how I always want to remember you; laughing, because you were happy to be spending time with me.

I remember hiking through the snow to chop down our own Christmas tree.

I remember standing around the stove in the early mornings in Colorado trying to stay warm.

I remember Mustard. How many parents would take care of a baby deer? I realize mom did the taking care part, but you could have said no way. You didn't. Art is like that. Poor man never knows what he may come home to. (I inherited that from mom, I guess.)

I remember the frogs in Oregon and the slugs. And how you used to pour salt. UGH.

And the lizards and the ice. My kids love it when you do that.

I remember the Mussels on a cold Oregon beach.

We have so many childhood memories, because you insisted on doing things together as a family. Sometimes that meant the family was attacked by a hive of bees, but hey, at least we were together! And the slide rocks; now a national park…but I can fondly remember the time when it was au natural…and the fun we had.

Mesa Verde, Yosemite, Yellowstone, Beaches…so many memories.

I remember catching the sucker fish on that cliff…I think it was in Oregon. You had double hooked my line. I was so excited to catch a fish and I could barely pull it in. You helped, and when we finally got it within sight, it was two huge sucker fish! What a day!

It was you that taught me the value of a simple photograph.

I remember that it was you who picked me up and carried me out to the car the night I lost my daughter.

It was you who carried me to the truck and rushed me to the hospital a few years later when I popped my stitches while camping.

It was you who begged me not to have anymore children, but to please adopt if we still wanted more.

I know you've paced and fretted and worried over me over the years. I know you love me.

And you've passed on great things to my children. Jonathan is so excited, because he thinks he's old enough to finally be able for Grandpa to teach him how to drive the Bobcat. He knows that's your tradition and he wants his turn.

You've given my children Yellowstone, fishing, camping, roasted marshmallows and growling bears behind a tree. You've given them the lizards and snakes and a love of nature.

You've given us all so much. I fretted because I didn't purchase a gift for you. And then I realized, maybe, just maybe, the best gift I could give you is to really let you know how much you mean to me, to my family, to our family. Because I don't think I've told you enough how much I really love you and look up to you. I'm not sure you realize just how great of a dad or a grandpa you are.

You are the best. You are number one in my book. And you have left and are still leaving a legacy of your self that will always be remembered.

This is my favorite picture of my dad.
Why? Because it shows how much he loves his family and wants to capture every moment with them.

Jun 18 2009

Things We Were Never Told About Being a Mom

I've been thinking about motherhood. You know, the kind of mommyhood really, where you never thought you'd do this or that? I remember being a child and wanting a large family. I wanted 8 kids and I was going to be a great mom. I'd cook for them, sew for them, play with them, and we'd be the best family there ever was.

Well, I am 40 years old. I have 5 kids, plus guardianship of my niece and nephew. Seven kids. Yup! Ok, well my oldest is 21 and living on his own now, but I'm still his mom. I took my youngest son to a doctor's appointment this week, and as we were sitting there discussing some stuff, the doctor brought out a poopy chart. I didn't know such a thing existed! In case you'd like to know what a poopy chart is, you can see it for yourself right here. The next few moments were a discussion of poopies, what they look like, etc.

Never in my daydreaming of motherhood did I imagine myself someday looking at a poopy chart! And I got to thinking…what else did I not ever think I'd do as a mother? I mean, motherhood is VERY different than what I imagined it'd be. Better, but different. So here's my list of thing's I never imagined I'd do as a mom:

Look at a poopy chart (sorry, I just can't get past the poopy chart!)
Cook chocolate covered mealworms for my son's birthday and feed them to his friends.
Pull a cockroach out of my 18 month old's mouth, alive and kicking (the cockroach, that is) not once, but twice. Ewww
Explain to a police officer that I am sorry there have been three 911 calls from this number of the past couple of years, but please be patient and understand I have five children; it's bound to happen again.
Explain to a profusely bleeding child as we run out of the mall that this is an ideal time to call 911.
Make green eggs and ham.
Homeschool.
As a mom who hates needles, I never ever expected I'd have to give my child a shot of epi during an anaphylactic reaction. Yes, I can do it if necessary!
Be able to drive a stick, hold a cloth to my child's severely bleeding head and get us to the hospital in less than five minutes. (She lived, but has a great scar after 17 staples to the head.)
Have to figure out how to cook a great dessert/meal without gluten, wheat, dairy, eggs, soy or nuts.
Find my daughter's frozen tastebuds connected to the top of a frozen orange juice can because her siblings convinced her to put her tongue on it after watching "A Christmas Story."
Take a dying lizard to the vet , crying, hoping that we could save it so my son would not be sad.
Have a range of pets over the years consisting of rats, hamsters, parakeets, lovebirds, ball phythons, garden snakes, water dragons, japaluras, rabbits, dogs, and whatever else I can be talked into.
Have a 7 ft python brought to my house…and then hold it.
Be filled with so much love.

I'm sure there is much more, but this is what I could come up with on the spur of the moment. Anyone else want to share?

And speaking of moms who could never have imagined, please pray for my friend, Kayla and her son, Elijah. She's such an inspiration. Elijah has EG and is tube fed a special formula. In my book, Kayla has gone above and beyond in the motherhood category. You can read her story at Bristle Ridge Academy