B-Boo - It's a Vivas Thing!

Mar 08 2018

Only so much time…

We are only given so much time.

Time to love. Time to laugh. Time to cry. Time to grow.

Time to spend with those we love.

Time to live.

We spend so much time being busy. Busy being a mom. An employee. The list goes on. Sometimes, we are forced to slow down. With my recent surgery, I was definitely forced into a slow down period. And as hard as it has been, the most positive part of it is the time it has given me to spend with my family, with friends, and more. It has been wonderful to spend time with precious friends I hadn’t seen in ages.

But even more, is the time I spend with my kids; my family. I know some people look forward to the “empty nester” stage. I know, I know….they have to grow up some time. But, in the meantime, I’m going to continue enjoying the walks in the park with my boys. It’s a time to talk and learn more about each other as we grow older. A time to learn that the Talented One loves Doris Day music. Who knew? I love her singing and acting! So we walk, and talk, and listen to music from “before my day” while my youngest son tries his hardest not to face plant on his new longboard. Then there’s the long talks on the back porch or at the kitchen table with the Smart One. Oh, how I treasure those moments with my boys. It won’t be long before they will be gone and the talks and walks will go with them.

The time I spend with my girls. When the Drama Queen rushes in bouncing on my bed to tell me (with full drama, of course) all about her day. And we often talk until one of us falls asleep. Or when the Princess tells me what she learned in health class today, or of deeper conversations of who she wants to be one day and how she’s going to get there.

I miss the days when my oldest daughter would watch a movie with me on a Sunday afternoon…and of course, fall asleep. Or we’d catch up after a long day, or plan trips together.

An my oldest…I miss going into his room in the evenings and chatting before bed.

As they get older, they find others to spend their time with. And naturally, a boyfriend/girlfriend, or a wonderful spouse.

Recently, I had some one on one with my oldest… and we had the best time just talking and eating ice cream. I actually went home and cried. Not because I was sad, but because it had been so long since we just sat and talked and enjoyed some time together…and so I was a emotional. He’ll understand it one day with his own children. The pride you feel as they grow older, but the pain you feel as they grow older.

Soon, we’ll be welcoming a new member into the family. I am so…overcome with emotion as I look forward to meeting my grand-baby. Oh, the talks we will have; the walks we will have…

But for now, I’m going to continue to enjoy the time I have in those moments on my porch, or in my bedroom, or at the park….and eating ice cream….and perhaps, even sneaking in a trip or two…

Jan 06 2018

Contagious Smiles

Christmas has come and gone and the 2018 has already begun. With my recent surgery, I’ve had a lot of sitting time; time with my children, and time with myself. I’m finally at the point of spending time on my computer, so I pulled up the photos from opening our gifts…and my heart was filled with warmth.

I’m more of a “wait to the last minute” kind of shopper…I don’t shop on Black Friday, and I like to personalize my gifts. I want to be able to find that perfect gift that they will remember. It’s not about expense, but more of a gift that will mean something to them. I think for me, I want them to know that I get them; that it’s important for me for them to know that I know them.

This year, I discovered I’d be having surgery, which meant I literally had a small amount of time to get the gifts, wrap them, and get the house ready for Christmas. Online shopping became my new best friend in helping me to find that perfect gift! There were many things that went undone. There were things I couldn’t do and had to have help with. I needed help wrapping presents as they arrived at the door. I needed help with grocery shopping for Christmas dinner. I needed help stuffing stockings on Christmas Eve. I needed help with so much. This Christmas was so not traditional at all.

Christmas Eve was spent on the couch in a recliner watching a movie instead of making cinnamon rolls for breakfast the next day. Christmas morning, my children set up breakfast once we all started moving around. We would be waiting until the evening when we could all gather together to open gifts.

My wonderful children all worked together to put a fantastic meal together. And finally, it was time to open gifts. They waited patiently when it was time for each of them to open their special gifts. And the smiles…contagious smiles all the way around. It just warmed my heart on a a day where tradition went out the window, that we all had such a nice time. The best gift they could have given me; happy to be together.

As the this year continues, I hope that we make time to just be together. To be happy. To enjoy one another. To make time for those that are important to us. And that there are smiles; lots of contagious smiles all around.

Jun 18 2016

Taking the Time to Notice…

Growing up, my family spent almost every weekend camping…and playing softball. Having lived in the city for the past 27 years, it’s hard for others to imagine me as anything other than a city girl. Until I start to share my stories, and then they laugh. You see, yes, I am a country girl at heart. If I could have it any way, I’d be in an A-frame cabin in the woods spending my days wandering around with my camera taking pictures and ending the evenings with a fire while listening to the crickets and watching for shooting stars. And somehow, there’d be lightning bugs as well.

I’ll admit, I don’t know how I’d survive anymore without the ability to run to the store at a moment’s notice, but I’m sure I’d save on my grocery bill!

Two things stand out to me from my childhood.

One is my mom and the horseback rides we would take. We would spend the entire day, sun-up to sun-down, riding. We got to where we could spot a deer, rabbit, snake, lizard, skunk, bird….we could spot them anywhere. We knew how to listen and to watch.

The other is my dad. He loved to take pictures. He was always showing slide shows of the photos he took. I have enjoyed spending time with him sharing photos as I grew older. One of my favorite photos is this one, where he and B-boo are sharing photos on one of our camping trips.

My dad taught me how to notice the little things as well. We’d go on walks and he would take time to point stuff out. A flower here, a butterfly or bee, the way the water ran over a certain rock in a river, or the shape that some sticks in the woods made. And if we were too noisy, he’d “shoosh” us so we wouldn’t scare off any animals and miss seeing them. And he would spend time with me talking about the photos we took.

Now I enjoy taking photos as I take walks with my kids. My youngest son loves to be my assistant. He helps change lenses and points out things I need to take a photo of. I mean, how many photos of bunnies can one possibly take, right? But, he’s starting to notice the surroundings now when we walk. Once home, I love to put them up on the computer and go over them with the kids as we critique them together.

Too often, we become so busy with life. Especially living in the city. We work hard all week, and spend our time relaxing in front of the television or playing video games. And there is nothing wrong with any of it. But I think in doing this, we often forget to notice what is around us. We forget to notice the little things. My advice? Take time to notice what is around you. And if you have a camera, try and capture it as you go along.

Here’s some fun from my weekend.

Jan 24 2015

Model Pranksters

So I came across a video this week and it really kinda got to me. It reminded me of the times we’ve gone with B-Boo to feed the homeless and pass out blankets. It never ceases to amaze me how no matter how down they are, they still rush to help each other and make sure the others are being taken care of as well.

They are the first to take care of each other. Instead of trying to get more, they offer what little they have. They are grateful for whatever they are given. They understand acts of kindness and love.

In the video, the well dressed guy is helped, while the homeless man is discarded; ignored. Which got me to thinking even more about people in general.

Who are we most like when it comes to showing kindness and compassion to others in our lives? Do we only show kindness to those who have it all together and ignore those in our lives who don’t?

Do we makes excuses for our own actions of meanness and indifference by convincing ourselves that those we treat this way somehow deserve it?

Even more, are we the one that has no problem showing mercy and grace to strangers who desperately need help, but then have no problem stepping on those in our own personal lives that need us more than ever?

Do we so easily discard those we claim to love like they are so undeserving of anything more from us?

I hope not!

I pray that I can be an example to those who surround me. That I can not become so wrapped up in my own life and my own needs, that I forget what love and compassion and kindness are all about. That I can look around and notice when there is a need and and act upon it…in the right way. I pray that I can stop making excuses for any mean thing that I do, and instead recognize it and stop myself, and do the right thing.

Do the right thing because it is what we are called to do.

I believe that we are called to be good, and true, and kind, and compassionate and to love others as we would want to be loved. I also know that sometimes, we are so caught up in ourselves that we forget.

Instead, we close our eyes to that which we don’t want to see and convince ourselves that our behavior is ok, when it really isn’t.

Meanness is never ok and love conquers all. Sometimes we just lose our focus and need a little reminder.

This is me, just being real.

Here’s the video.

Oct 19 2014

Family

When our kids were younger, it was often said we looked for any reason to celebrate. We’d have families over with their kids and had so much fun. (I miss those days). The older the kids get, the less you have these times. I get it. But still….

Even within our own family, it is harder and harder for our growing family to all be in the same place at once. Still, I know we all try and if one of us is missing, it is noticeable. I’m glad we have instilled in our family that there are just times when we all need to be together. They may jokingly grumble or make a face, but I know they all look forward to ALL of us being together.

I know I look forward to it.

Yesterday was Drama Queen’s birthday. And while I am thrilled that it was her birthday and I look forward to our “annual selfie birthday photo,” it’s also put me in a good mood just knowing I was going to have my whole family together yesterday.

And I knew I was going to ask for a family photo and that they would grumble because they hate it and there are too many of us and they are still growing so who is shorter and taller is a little confusing now, but still, they went and took one for me. And ONE shot was all we had, soooo…but any way. 🙂

I guess this is why Fall is one of my favorite times of the year. It’s not so much Thanksgiving and Christmas, but knowing that we have three family birthdays, plus family/friend parties, plus the holidays and more. It’s knowing that for the next few months there will be fires outside and beautiful weather, with laughter and talking and times for us to get together and irritate each other and laugh at and with each other….it’s all of that time we have together as a family…and embrace it as we continue to grow and change and well, this is my family…and I love them. 🙂