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Dec 22 2016

Mama Bear Vent!

Ok, I don’t rant often, but …

As a mother of a child who has severe food allergies, it just doesn’t make sense to me why others do not take it seriously. Keep in mind, I manage a school, so I am able to see both sides of the coin; how hard is is to regulate, and how seriously we need to take it in order to keep our students safe.

My 5th child was diagnosed with severe food allergies when she was just five months old. It changed our world. She was literally the first patient her pediatrician had ever had with food allergies. He had no idea how to deal with it, but by the time she was eight, he was an advocate of educating others about them. When my daughter was young, it was nearly impossible to even find someone who would watch her because they were afraid of her food allergies. I get it. I remember the first time I left her alone overnight…that was when I finally agreed to a cell phone! It was scary.

I remember putting her in school for the first time, in the 2nd grade. THAT was scary. What if someone touched her after they had eaten peanuts? What if they breathed on her? I remember reading an article once about a 15 year old girl who died from of a kiss from her boyfriend who had eaten peanuts earlier in the day; she never told her boyfriend she was allergic.

From a very young age, I worked hard to teach my daughter to advocate for herself. Don’t touch things that don’t belong to you; don’t hold hands with other students. Don’t kiss anyone or let them kiss you. Don’t share food or drinks. Don’t eat anything if you haven’t checked yourself to make sure it is safe; not everyone understands how to read food labels for ingredients. It’s too dangerous.

Today, more people are aware of food allergies than every before. Food allergies affect 1 in every 13 children in the US. There are now laws mandating that food be labeled clearly. More and more facilities/vendors are peanut free; or at the very least, have a space that is peanut free. Restaurants are more aware of what they are serving than ever before.

But…when it comes to air travel…..

I remember the first time we ever traveled by air with my daughter. We carried her onto the plane, wiped down everything she could come into contact with, and put a crib sheet over the seat she was sitting in. We flew Southwest because they did not serve peanuts on the flight that she was on. We tried to take the first flight out to make sure it was as safe as possible, but if we could not, the flight attendants were always nice and checked for any loose peanuts when we flew with them.

We haven’t flown in a few years. But recently, one of our dear friends booked a flight for her as a gift for her 16th birthday present. I was not too concerned since their website states, “Inflight food offerings may contain trace amounts of nut ingredients, or may have been processed in facilities that also process nuts. In addition, we are unable to prevent other passengers from bringing nuts and/or products containing nuts onboard our flights.” To me, this meant that although they could not prevent others from bringing nuts on the plane, they would only be serving foods that may contain trace amounts. So, as long as she doesn’t eat a nut, or someone next to her doesn’t touch her after eating nuts, she would be ok.

Not so the case.

I will say that their staff was very nice for her flight to her destination. They allowed me to go to the gate with her. (This is at their discretion since she is now 16.) Once we arrived at the gate, we informed them of her peanut allergy and that she was carrying epi-pens and she would be wiping down her seats. They were very nice and let her board first. I stayed to make sure she got off safely.

And a good thing! Because the next thing I knew, they were calling me over and letting me know they were going to de-board her from the plane. Their reasoning was that her peanut allergy was too severe and they were contacting medical to see if they would approve the flight. Twenty minutes later, she got approval to fly. They put her on the back seat and the flight attendants took excellent care of her.

And they served peanuts on the flight….not food with trace amounts, but the actual peanuts themselves.

Fast forward to today:

A) The man at check-in refused to let an adult go to the gate with her even though the flight was delayed because she is 16. He was also made aware of her peanut allergy and he said he would let them know AND that he had changed her seat to make it more safe for her.

B) He didn’t tell anyone AND he didn’t change her seat.

My  vent? I understand policy and procedure. It’s not the airline’s fault my daughter has a peanut allergy. HOWEVER, the airlines should very clearly state on their website that they SERVE peanuts on their flights so that their customers can make INFORMED decisions before they hand over their money AND THEN get kicked off of the flight because it isn’t safe.  Family kicked off flight over peanut allergy

My bigger vent? With food allergies ever growing, why aren’t they taken more seriously? Public schools in Nevada now have to carry epi-pens just in case a student goes into anaphylaxis. My daughter’s school FASA has had to use the school epi-pens multiple times on students who do not carry an epi-pen or did not even know they needed one.

One would think that with the millions of people that fly every day, the airlines would take peanut allergies more seriously and just not serve peanuts, or at the very least, on flights that have customers with peanut allergies on them.

I am an even bigger fan of Southwest airlines these days. They have no problem announcing to the other passengers that there is a passenger with a severe peanut allergy on the flight and that no peanuts will be served; and they offer an alternative (pretzels) when it comes to these flights.

Meanwhile, after four hours of sitting in an airport by herself because she is considered to be an adult, my daughter’s flight just got cancelled. She’s not old enough to book a hotel room by herself, and she won’t be flying out until tomorrow afternoon at the earliest.

Thank goodness for fantastic friends who have no problem waiting in the freezing cold until the airline could finally make a decision about the flight. Thank you, fantastic friend, for waiting as she makes her way out of the airport to the warmth of your car and I’m sure, a warm hug, because you are careful of her food allergies.

 

Written by Hope · Categorized: Drama Queen, Food Allergies/Gluten Free, Health, Just Being Real, Late Night Ponderings · Tagged: drama queen, food allergies, friendship, parenting

Nov 06 2016

Capturing those special moments…

Last weekend we celebrated my daughter’s Sweet 16. This is a moment she has been looking forward to since we started planning her older sister’s Sweet 16 over five years ago. She has talked about it and talked about it for years.

We spent plenty of time planning the event, right down to what food, what it will look like, when her brothers will dance with her, when her sisters will dance with her, what the rest of the familia will be doing….it’s all been in the planning stages for what seems forever.

So it was only natural that I wanted to capture every moment. Even more so, since I love capturing those special moments with my camera. Actually, I love capturing any moment on my camera. 🙂 And the older my teens get, the more I don’t want to miss out on anything. I realize even more today, that there is only so much time left with them. Having four adult children already, there is so much that I miss. And that’s ok, they are adults and have to be about adulting. But, the only way I get to share in those moments is when they share with me what they have been doing, whether it be a conversation, a photo, or both!

Luckily, my son’s girlfriend shares a love for photographing with me. So when we celebrated family style, she was all about capturing those precious moments for me. And between the two of us, we captured a lot of memories.

But there was a precise moment, when we were all dancing together and having fun, and I thought to myself, “I need to stop and go get my camera.”

And then, it hit me. Sometimes we need to take a step back and just enjoy the moment that we are in. We just can’t capture everything on camera. And that is ok. What’s more important is for us to just relax, be in the moment, have fun, smile, and make a memory.

Capturing a moment on camera is something to be treasured.

Making a memory is something never will never be offered again.

And so, I put down my camera, and I danced. And I laughed. And I captured the moment in my heart.

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Written by Hope · Categorized: Drama Queen, Family, Photography, The Vivas Family! · Tagged: drama queen, family, family time, friends

Sep 25 2016

No Way!

When the Drama Queen first mentioned she wanted to go to the iHeart Radio Musical Festival, I will admit that my first thought was, “No way!” But I have learned thru the many years of being a mom that sometimes we have to shove away our thoughts of no way and listen to what is being asked.

(*Tangent* I am a firm believer of the gut as a mom. I tend to listen to what it says.)

She really wanted to go. Told me all about the artists that would be there. Said she would find a responsible friend or older sibling to go with her. And the more she talked, the more I realized that this was an opportunity being given to me to:

(A) Spend some quality time with my quickly growing daughter. I have two years left with her before she starts adulting.

(B) Show her that I am absolutely willing to have fun with her and her interests.

(C) Protect my daughter while she is in the middle of possible mobs of people!

(D) Give her the best 16th birthday gift ever!

(E) I would get to see Sam Hunt!!!

So, we had a conversation. I told her I would absolutely let her go to the festival on one condition. I would be the one going with her. 😱

She digested for a few moments and then agreed. And over the next several weeks we listened to songs of everyone who would be there. We talked of what to expect, the artists I wouldn’t like, etc.

…and then it was time! We had to park far away and take the free shuttle. This ended up with us finally paying someone to take us so we wouldn’t miss everything. So she got to see mom negotiate and agree if he got us there quickly and didn’t wait around.

There was the many conversations with different people of all ages and who they were there to see.

There was the crazy drunk girls. And learning how to react to a situation that could end badly. And how the surrounding people were willing to work together to move away from them a little at a time: together. And the conversation of why she would never do that. And the Mama Bear in me that wasn’t about to let anyone smash my kiddo.

There was the lady who was near passing out from the crowds and heat. And how we all worked together to help the situation and get her out of there.

There was the mob. Once you are in, you are in. And slowly we made our way closer and closer with the crowd. It was crazy and loud and standing all day.

And there was the many conversations of the artists and their music. What was good, bad, and amazing. We talked about their talent and their attitudes. And yes, there was one artist who was so talented yet so inappropriate. And we talked about his lyrics and his talent and what he does with it. And it was a great conversation!

But most of all, we had a wonderful day together. We laughed and sang and danced and were exhausted and starving by the end of the day. And as we sat eating, she thanked me for going with her.

And that’s why I shoved the “no way” thought away. We would have missed out on an awesome day spent together.


As parents, we are given unique opportunities to spend with our children. Embrace them. Have fun. Live a little. Love a lot.

Written by Hope · Categorized: Drama Queen, Family, Just Being Real, Uncategorized · Tagged: drama queen, family, family time, memories

Nov 27 2015

Quotable Quotes #25

As a mom of seven, I often call my kids by the wrong name. I have had many complaints about this over the years. Tonight, however, I reached a new low. I was sitting with the Drama Queen who had smoked up the house with her cooking. It still felt cold, so I asked her if she’d shut the window all the way.

“Yes, Mom. I shut the window.”

“Are you sure you shut the window because I feel a breeze.”

“Yes, Mom. I shut the window.”

“It’s chilly in here. Are you sure you shut the window.”

She gets up and proceeds to finish shutting the window.

“That’s my boy…I mean…girl.”

Her response?

“Mom, I expect you to not know my name, but at least you could get my gender right.”

Oops!

Written by Hope · Categorized: Drama Queen, Humor, Quotable Quotes · Tagged: drama queen, family, humor, quotable quotes

Feb 22 2015

Cousin Fun!

For those of you who have big families, I am sure you can understand how our family dynamics work when we all get together. The older generation are the grandparents. The next generation has us all as “Tio and Tia.” We are actually most of us cousins, but there are just too many of us. Then, all of the younger generation are simply cousins. That’s just how we roll.

There is always a lot of laughter when we are together and one never knows what to expect. We’ve raised our kids in this madness which can only make things crazier. Ah, the stories we could share…

Like the time one of the younger ones was conned into shaving her lips…

Or when two of them decided to sandwich another one; only the victim knew it was about to happen so moved at the last minute. And the two troublemakers had a head on collision…literally; resulting in a lot of blood, swelling, and attempt to cover it up…as if we wouldn’t notice the aftermath!

Bella Sandwich
Apparently they didn’t think we would notice anything different about her face….

Most recently, hubby took the DQ to go visit his parents for a few days. She was thrilled to be able to spend time with her favorite cousins.

Crazy Cousins
The one of her right is six months older…the one on the left is 2 years older.
photo 1 (4)
It’s the only way she’ll ever be taller than them!

 

In keeping with their usual antics, they decided to play a little game. So not long after she’d arrived, my sister-in-law sent me this photo.

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Afraid to ask what had happened, she assured me that no one was hurt and sent me the following videos…which she took….in slow motion.

Not to be outdone by his younger brother, my nephew decided to try it too, if the DQ was still up for it. (Of course she was!) only he landed in the wall, which explains the first photo she sent.

We are planning a trip together in a few months.

Hopefully with ALL OF US!

Hopefully we will all survive!

I can hardly wait for it!

Written by Hope · Categorized: Drama Queen, Family, Humor, The Vivas Family!, Video Moment · Tagged: drama queen, family, family time, humor, teenagers

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