The Vivas Family! - It's a Vivas Thing!

Sep 30 2009

20 Degrees

20 Degrees. That's how much the temperature dropped in the last 24 hours. We saw it coming. And we laughed. Because we knew what that meant for a certain member of our family.

We mention Colorado for Christmas and she visibly flinches. "But Mom, there will be snow! We live in the desert!" Colorado in the summer; she can hardly wait. Colorado in the winter…she'll pass. It's the same for winter activities. Dad takes the kids up to play in the snow; she's happy to stay behind.

You see, she says we live in the desert for a reason. And because we live in the desert, she firmly believes that the weather should never fall below…oh, 90 degrees. So when it went from 96 yesterday to 76 today, we knew B-boo was going to be having issues. And this morning, sure enough, it's not only in the 60's, it also WINDY!

Poor B-boo. I made sure she had her hot chocolate this morning. Well, actually, I was still making the Talented One's omelet, but I heated up the milk. I made sure it was hot, too. Apparently, too hot, in my eagerness to keep her warm this morning.

And then she noticed the WIND. Poor, poor desert girl. She just couldn't help it; comments about living in the desert just kept pouring out of her mouth.

And we grinned. And we giggled. And we tried really hard not to make fun of her.

The Talented One went on and on about how beautiful the weather is. He loves it. I remarked that I'll be able to leave the windows open! (That would have to wait until she was gone to school.)

It's really not that cold. It's not cold at all; unless you're B-boo, the only person I know who will wear a hoodie in 100 degree weather.

And so it came time to actually leave the house. The Talented One and I giggled all the way out the door while she mumbled about hurrying up to get in the van. And she made it without freezing, too. And I thought all was well.

Until I heard her yell out, "You heartless jerk!"

And I saw the Talented One laugh with glee.

He wasn't very nice; he'd turned the air conditioner on full blast on his sister.

It's so nice having a large family!

Sep 15 2009

Randomness

That's kind of the way we are sometimes. OK, a LOT of the time. It's hard to keep up with us in a conversation, usually, because in a house of eight people, there are several conversations going on at once. It can be quite hilarious at times, especially when one does not realize the conversation has moved on without them, and they make a comment…that has nothing to do with what we're talking about anymore. Hilarious.

Another thing about us. We have a lot of funny inside jokes. We don't mean to. Honest. It's just that sometimes we'll be reminded of something funny that happened and make a comment…then we'll burst into laughter. The problem with that is that whoever else we are with doesn't get it. We don't' mean to be that way, honest.

Things like glow in the dark underwear and light bulbs crack us up. It will always be that way. One of our children burned their underwear once trying to make them glow. Underwear comments, spotting certain brands of underwear, make us laugh. Actually, underwear alone in our family would make a blog of it's own! Really! Superman underwear (I can't share that one, sorry!), April Fool's Day underwear (hubby's underwear was sewn shut as a prank…lots of them…hilarious!), wearing briefs outside talking to your neighbor thinking you have shorts on (that's hubby, too). Underwear makes us laugh.

You heartless jerk. That throws us into fits. We're a nice family and we don't go around calling people heartless jerks, honest. It's just that one night we were helping B-boo with similes homework. We were searching the internet, working together and laughing at things like, "cold as ice" and "raining cats and dogs" when all of a sudden, hubby turns around and shouts at, "You heartless jerk!" Apparently his search gave him that phrase…and since we don't use language like that, he scared us. And we went into fits of giggles over it…and well, now it's a staple of our language only we're the only ones that get it.

Unibrow cracks us up, too. Poor Drama Queen about had a fit one time because she noticed she had a unibrow when she frowns.

Random quotes. Sometimes they show up out of the blue.

"But we likeeeee you." (Overboard)

"Anybody want a peanut?" (Princess Bride)

"Kids! Can't live with them, can't shoot'em!" (Grumpier Old Men)

We may sometimes seem unfocused. Not the case. Ok, this is usually me. I know what I'm saying and to whom I'm saying it; it's not my fault if they can't keep up. An example is this morning. I'm talking to hubby about something. The Drama Queen is showing me something while I'm listening to hubby talk. I say,

"That's gross!" to the Drama Queen.

Then I have to explain to hubby that "No, I don't think you're gross, it's the Drama Queen."

Things like that happen alot. I call it a gift, able to maintain a conversation with five different people at once. It's no my fault other's get confused!

Sometimes names get confused. Sometimes they are half one name and half the other. This simply means that whichever half I end on is the one I am talking to. The kids get it, that's all that matters. Hubby tried this out on B-boo last night. He mixed it up the wrong way though, and so it didn't work with him.

One of our children is a little slow at times. This causes "said child" to burst into an "OH, I get it moment" at random times. It's ok, we love her anyway and accept her just the way she is. 🙂

Sometimes I'm known to burst into rhyme. Some of the kids play along. Other's roll their eyes and whine, "Mommmm!"

Oh, and sometimes the Smart One and I will burst into jingles. He's better than I am and usually gives me the smile that says, "I can't believe I'm doing this with her again…she's so corny."

Faces. Oh, we have a lot of them in our home. Not always at the most convenient times either. I can usually tell if one is being made behind me though, because the person that is getting lectured I'm having a conversation with starts to have problems maintaining eye contact. Not cool.

Clumsiness…nevermind, let's not go there.

We can be serious when we need to…and act quickly if necessary.

This means 5 am phone calls and shouts to get upstairs immediately are followed. (It also means that you're hamster has been found.)

If Dad screams at you to call the Burford's, you do so immediately, without asking. When mom asks why and he shouts that he needs to find B-boo…and B-boo is dialing, you hang up. (Sorry, Mr. Burford, that crank call yesterday evening was us.) (We later found out that poor dad was on the roof and saw a auto accident happen. He knew his girls were probably at the corner at that moment. What he didn't know is that they had already made it home. And that B-boo was the one doing the dialing. Poor dad. Once he was calm, we had a good laugh.)

Sometimes not so smart things happen. For example, if the green bean casserole catches on fire in the electric oven…Dad still throws a pitcher of water on it to put it out. And then we say a special thanks that no one was electrocuted at the same time!

911 calls. A nice officer once told me that I had had three false 911 calls over a span of so much time. I know, officer, and I'm really sorry. And it may happen again, officer. You see, I have lots of children. and they call during non-emergencies to see if you'll really show up. I do tell them that's not good. If you'd like, I'll try to teach them to call during real emergencies…it's just that when they happen (and they do!) I usually am rushing them to the hospital myself because I've had so much practice I can do it faster than you.

Pranks. Big family, lots of pranks. This means be very careful if you are walking anywhere…because at any given time someone can jump out at you and scare the living daylights out of you. It means I'll find frozen tastebuds on the orange juice can. It means plastic bugs, snakes, spiders, etc….can be found at the most inopportune time. It means little ones shaving their lips. It means having your underwear sewn shut…or having confetti fly out of the air conditioning when you start up the van.

Chaos. You know, I'm not even going to go there!

Randomness. This is me, being random…about our randomness.

Aug 29 2009

The Princess

That would be my niece, the princess. The first time she came to live with us, she was 14 months old. I'm sure we looked quite the family, all of us dark haired wonders…and in the middle, there was this blond-haired green-eyed beauty. She lived with us for over a year while her momma tried to pull her life back together, and after 14 months, she went home to live with her momma and three month old baby brother. And our lives felt as if they'd been ripped apart. And we mourned the loss of our little blond baby.

We'd see her on holidays and birthdays and watch her grow older. We knew she had issues, but we also knew that there was nothing we could do about it.

Six months ago, the princess came back to live with us, this time, bringing along her now five year old brother. And so it is.

I won't lie and say that life hasn't dealt her some pretty hard blows. I also won't lie and say it is easy; it's even harder this time around. There are many days when I just want to give up because frankly, it's just too hard. But I remind myself (or others remind me) that our God is a big God and He knows what He is doing. And so we try harder.

The Princess has ADHD, Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), and much more. She's not able to trust; not able to let it go and let herself love. She struggles in school, at home, everywhere. She has a strong need to be in control and has a hard time making friends. She has an even stronger need to be accepted, to be wanted, to be loved. And it's hard.

I imagine that as hard as it is for the rest of us, it's even harder for her. In a world that has completely let her down, she has to survive.

Sometimes, my selfishness, my humanness, gets in the way of me. I wonder if I'm really making a difference in her life. It *seems* that she pushes me away more than she asks me to never leave her. And I beg Him to just give me a little sign that I"m doing the right thing; that perhaps she is healing.

Several weeks ago, I gave her a princess bracelet. She loves princesses and wants to be one. What little girl wouldn't? Especially one who has never felt like a princess before. So when I saw the bracelet, I thought of her and how much she'd like it. I presented it to her and told her all about how she was my princess and that pretty heart charm was to show her how much I love her. She accepted the gift. It quickly broke and was forgotten. On our way home, my mom handed it to me. It didn't seem like much, but to me, it signified how easily the Princess will move on, not really attaching to anything. I understand it's part of the RAD, but when I'm worn down, it still hurts. Selfish, I know. I brought the bracelet home and put the heart charm into my jewelry box.

Sunday, her momma gave her a pretty pink bracelet with a pretty pink heart charm. She wore it home and treasures it. She is thrilled to finally have her momma make her feel like a princess. I get that. I am happy for her. On Wednesday, we got to school and she realized she'd forgotten to put her bracelet on. She lost it. I felt like the meanest mom/aunt that morning because as much as I told her I understood, I have no idea what it is like to go through what she has. And I felt even worse, because that afternoon, when she got home and asked me to help her put the bracelet on, my heart hurt…because she was so excited for this gift from the one who has so often rejected her and yet, she rejected me. And try as I might to tell myself to grow up, I wondered if I was really helping her at all.

Until last night. Because last night, she came downstairs with something in her hand. It was a little silver heart with a pink stone in it. She said she was carrying it around, because it was from her other momma; me. And she didn't have anything to put the heart on…and could I please put it on her bracelet with the heart from her other momma. And so we did. And she was so happy, because now she had both of her momma's hearts to wear all the time.

And I learned something from my princess, the little girl who has such a hard time showing, and receiving, love. I learned that a little girl who so easily tosses things aside, kept that special heart, and held on to it, and never said a word about it. I learned that our God cares enough about the both of us; enough to let her know how much she is loved and enough to show me that He is at work, even when I can't see it.

Aug 27 2009

The Drama Queen

Or, as we like to say, "And then there was…"

Yup, that's her. Our very on Drama Queen. A brilliant ray of light, full of energy that refuses to be told she can't do anything. Her name, roughly translated, means,

"A beautiful rainbow we don't deserve."

Yes, that about sums her up!

After a complicated pregnancy, the Drama Queen arrived two weeks early, on the only day that week that was not someone else's birthday. Within a couple of weeks, we knew something was wrong with her. For the next five months, we'd travel back and forth to the doctor over and over, trying to get them to figure out what was it was that was making her so sick. Finally, a diagnosis. She was suffering from severe food allergies. Severe enough to land her in the hospital on more than one occasion…and for me to get over my fear of needles since I was the one that was her main care giver.

As we began a whole new lifestyle of eating, I worked hard to educate myself on the in's and out's of food allergies and to try out new recipes. Not easy when you can only cook with a handful of ingredients: chicken, turkey, rice, potatoes, carrots, broccoli, apples, tapioca, salt and pepper. Yes, I'm serious.

When she was finally able to have soy, I was ecstatic! Adding in beef and beans later was awesome. And then, we could finally have melons…oh, how happy we were! Yes, we. Because of the severity of her food allergies, she could not have formula. This meant that I had to follow a strict diet, too. And so it went.

These days, she's allergic to peanuts, tree nuts, eggs, apples and dairy. Her brother, the Smart One, is on a gluten free, nut free diet, so sometimes cooking for the two of them together is hard; but we manage to have some pretty decent meals anyway!

So what is it about the Drama Queen anyway? Well, she has a pretty high tolerance for pain, kind of like her momma. Translated into English, this means that:

When she says a penny is stuck in her throat, yet doesn't act like it, you take her to the hospital anyway. And they don't believe you until an x-ray proves it and then they do surgery.

When a VCR lands on her feet and nearly slices off two of her toes, and she has to have them stitched back together, she can still go right outside and run around instead of sitting for the next week.

When she goes into anaphylaxis she will try and go about her play in spite of the swelling and hives.

When 300 pounds of plexi-glass land on her foot and she can walk anyway, you take her to the ER. Odds are, it's broke. And when they send you away anyway and tell you it can't possibly be broke because she's fine, you nod your head and drive away…and then come back again when they call you to tell you that the x-ray showed it was indeed broke, after all. It also means that she'll go through a boot thing once a week for three weeks, destroying them, until you finally give up and tell her to just wear her sneakers and try not to make it worse. Oh, and you beg her not to show people where it's broke by moving it around. That's just gross.

When she flies off of a swing that she wasn't supposed to be on anyway and lands on a two-by-four in an anthill, you take her to the ER. And even though the nurse says it can't possibly be that bad, you scream for a doctor anyway, because you've seen it, and you know. And then you take her home with 17, yes SEVENTEEN staples in the back of her head, and you're told to keep her down for the next 48 hours. Sure, OK.

And all she wants to know is when can she please go outside and play…and climb her favorite tree, the big Mulberry tree that she's been climbing since she was about a year old. The same one that her older brother had to climb up into and get her out over and over….until we finally got smart and taught her how to get down, too.

The Drama Queen is just that. She wants to try everything. She is all about living life to the fullest. The righter of wrongs. The sheriff of the house. The let's just have some fun child.

She loves to sing…and sing….and sing, especially if it's about her Lord.

She loves music…all of it. Celtic Women, Bocelli, Selah, Barlow Girl, Newsboys, Celine Dion, and Journey (cause Mom really likes Journey.)

She loves to dance. She started a new dance class this week, so I've had the pleasure of listening to her tap away on the kitchen floor…over and over and over again. Because it annoys her siblings, so she waits until it's just the two of us. Yup.

She's all about fashion. It has to be shiny, or glittery, and of course, noticeable…because she's also all about that. And honest. Sometimes too much. She's had to learn a thing or two about humbleness and just because it's true does not mean you should say it.

She loves babies and can't wait until she can babysit all by herself.

She can make friends with just about anyone…and usually does.

She loves to talk on the phone and can't possibly understand why we won't let her have a cell phone…because, well, she needs it.

She wants to live life!

This is our Drama Queen. The wannabe pop star, actress, and doctor. Because, yes, she can do it all!

If you'd like to listen to some of her singing, click here.

Aug 23 2009

The Smart One

Our youngest son is the one we call the Smart One. He is number four of our children and probably the most interesting one. Or interested one. When I was pregnant with him, his kidneys were full of more than the normal fluid, so we had quite a few ultrasounds to monitor him. For a time, they thought he may have Down's Syndrome, so we prayed our way through that, too. Born two weeks early, he was just fine! Or so we thought.

By the time he was a year old, he'd pretty much stopped eating. He'd never been a fan of baby food and just seemed to have no interest in table food either. He was in failure to thrive and losing weight, so they sent us off to a gastroenterologist and nutritionist, both of whom felt that he just didn't have normal taste buds. Yes, I am serious. He was a smart one though!

At six months, the boy could work a remote control! By the time he was one, he was chatting up a storm. He was so tiny, yet could speak so clearly people were amazed. He had amazing fine motor skills and a fascination for taking things apart and putting them back together.

Throughout the next several years, he'd continue to see different specialists because of his digestive issues, failure to thrive and extreme leg cramps. Finally, when nothing could be found wrong with him, we gave up, and he just learned to live with it. Until a little over a year ago, when we just couldn't take it anymore! So, off to Loma Linda we went in search of some answers! Turns out he has food allergies and cannot have any gluten. Once they were removed, he started to grow and gain weight. Lots of it! (Ok, he's still thin, but 15 pounds in a year is pretty good in my book!)

So what's so different about the boy? Well, he loves tools. Seriously! A few years ago we got him his own set of tools. Yes, real ones. The boy loves to change light bulbs and fix things for us. If Dad is fixing something, he's there. If he can do it on his own before Dad gets home, he will. I call him my toolman!

He also likes to talk. A lot. In detail. Sometimes hubby will call me and ask what I'm doing. I'll tell him I'm listening to the Smart One. He'll reply that he'll call me back in an hour!

He's a funny kid!

He has every "Free-Credit-Report.com" song memorized.

He still loves to take things apart; and then put them back together.

He loves his mom; a plus in my book!

He loves Karate and he's pretty good at it, too. Just got his red belt in August!

He loves to teach others.

He loves his dog; which is so much like him.

He knows how to drive a Bobcat!

He started in the youth group today. He loved it! I'm glad! He's growing up.

And tomorrow he starts middle school. No more homeschooling for him; he'll go into a school of over 1500 middle schoolers. I'm not sure I'm ready. I hope he is. I think he'll like it. I know he's nervous, so I've put up a good front, pretending I'm not.

Tomorrow's a new day for both of us, and I can't wait to hear all about it when he gets home!