Friendship - It's a Vivas Thing!

Jun 18 2009

Things We Were Never Told About Being a Mom

I've been thinking about motherhood. You know, the kind of mommyhood really, where you never thought you'd do this or that? I remember being a child and wanting a large family. I wanted 8 kids and I was going to be a great mom. I'd cook for them, sew for them, play with them, and we'd be the best family there ever was.

Well, I am 40 years old. I have 5 kids, plus guardianship of my niece and nephew. Seven kids. Yup! Ok, well my oldest is 21 and living on his own now, but I'm still his mom. I took my youngest son to a doctor's appointment this week, and as we were sitting there discussing some stuff, the doctor brought out a poopy chart. I didn't know such a thing existed! In case you'd like to know what a poopy chart is, you can see it for yourself right here. The next few moments were a discussion of poopies, what they look like, etc.

Never in my daydreaming of motherhood did I imagine myself someday looking at a poopy chart! And I got to thinking…what else did I not ever think I'd do as a mother? I mean, motherhood is VERY different than what I imagined it'd be. Better, but different. So here's my list of thing's I never imagined I'd do as a mom:

Look at a poopy chart (sorry, I just can't get past the poopy chart!)
Cook chocolate covered mealworms for my son's birthday and feed them to his friends.
Pull a cockroach out of my 18 month old's mouth, alive and kicking (the cockroach, that is) not once, but twice. Ewww
Explain to a police officer that I am sorry there have been three 911 calls from this number of the past couple of years, but please be patient and understand I have five children; it's bound to happen again.
Explain to a profusely bleeding child as we run out of the mall that this is an ideal time to call 911.
Make green eggs and ham.
Homeschool.
As a mom who hates needles, I never ever expected I'd have to give my child a shot of epi during an anaphylactic reaction. Yes, I can do it if necessary!
Be able to drive a stick, hold a cloth to my child's severely bleeding head and get us to the hospital in less than five minutes. (She lived, but has a great scar after 17 staples to the head.)
Have to figure out how to cook a great dessert/meal without gluten, wheat, dairy, eggs, soy or nuts.
Find my daughter's frozen tastebuds connected to the top of a frozen orange juice can because her siblings convinced her to put her tongue on it after watching "A Christmas Story."
Take a dying lizard to the vet , crying, hoping that we could save it so my son would not be sad.
Have a range of pets over the years consisting of rats, hamsters, parakeets, lovebirds, ball phythons, garden snakes, water dragons, japaluras, rabbits, dogs, and whatever else I can be talked into.
Have a 7 ft python brought to my house…and then hold it.
Be filled with so much love.

I'm sure there is much more, but this is what I could come up with on the spur of the moment. Anyone else want to share?

And speaking of moms who could never have imagined, please pray for my friend, Kayla and her son, Elijah. She's such an inspiration. Elijah has EG and is tube fed a special formula. In my book, Kayla has gone above and beyond in the motherhood category. You can read her story at Bristle Ridge Academy

Jun 16 2009

Surviving without B-Boo!

B-Boo and I started traveling together when she was about 7 years old. She was in competitive gymnastics and so from the months of January thru February, we would take off on the weekends for competitions. We did this for four years. A lot of the trips the rest of the family would come along, but for almost as many we traveled together, just the two of us. B-Boo became great at packing in a heartbeat for whatever trip we were headed out to together. She stopped competing a couple of years ago, and while I don't think either of us misses the grueling competition schedule much, we both will admit to missing the traveling part of it! What fun we had traveling with a team of girls, getting stuck in airports, elevators and fixing up their hair for competition.

Then B-Boo got sick…and we started traveling to doctor's offices together. Again, we had a system…because waiting in waiting rooms day after day, week after week is not a lot of fun. So, we'd pack cards and a cell phone full of games. We'd play speed and yahtzee and make the best of it. Her illness took us from Los Angeles to Kansas City, Missouri, so again, we traveled, this time taking her younger sister with us. It is amazing how much we can pack in a suitcase or a duffel bag!

She is finally at a time in her life when she is healthy for the most part and ready to travel for fun, but there aren't a lot of those trips right now. Bummer. These days our trips consist of running to the grocery store, the bank, Walmart or the mall. Even more, they consist of me running out the door, almost late for yet another appointment, while she pushes me out with whatever items I need for the day. You know what's amazing? I don't even have to tell her what I need! She just knows. She'll be at the door saying,

"Mom, go! The kids are in the car, your purse is in the car and (whatever papers I need for that day) are in the car."

And then she'll hand me my cell phone and either come with me or push me out the door.

She's like this when we go to the grocery store, too. Sometimes we're not in a hurry to get somewhere else fast, so we'll take a stroll together through the store and have a nice chat. Other days, she knows we're on a time limit, so she'll say, "Ok, what else do we need?" and off she goes to get it. That girl has more of me in her than I realized!

This week I'm in Loma Linda with my son (and youngest daugter). After a very long Sunday night, I was exhausted yesterday, yet needed to travel to California. As I was trying to pack, she started adding things in.

"I know you're going to need this, Mom, I know you."

She was right, of course. Even knowing that this time, I'd be traveling without her, she was still trying to help me get out the door. What an awesome daughter I have!

I started missing her quickly. I'm so used to her sitting next to me, my copilot. She'll get me a drink when mine is empty; making sure to open it up for me and have it ready to grab. She knows exactly where to put my hot tamales, as I never travel without them. She knows exactly where to find the map when I'm not sure what street to turn on. (She's not so great with reading a map, so this is where we kind of draw the line!)

She's spoiled me so much! Yesterday, I had to ask my youngest daughter to open my drink for me, please. Then I had to ask her to open my hot tamales. It just wasn't the same, not having B-Boo next to me. The younger children ride in the back, so I am up front all by myself. (I have that song, "All by myself, Don't wanna be" running through my head right now!) I really miss her!

When I hit San Bernadino, my son jumped up into the co-pilot seat…ready with the map. He apologized for not being a better co-pilot. I thought that was funny. I never said anything to him about being a co-pilot, but apparently he's picked up on this particular job that B-Boo has done for so long. He's not so great with drinks and hot tamales, but we did learn he has one particular skill.

He can read a map!

Last night, I didn't sleep so well. Why? Well, because I left my pillow in the van…you know, the one that B-Boo threw in at the last moment saying, "I know you, Mom, you'll want your pillow." She was right, or course.

Jun 13 2009

All Things Creepy!

Yesterday was the Talented One's 16th birthday…and since you only turn 16 once…well, we had a few surprises in store for him. We started off with a kidnapping to get him out of the house.

I don't think he expected to be dropped!

After several hours, he was brought to the party; blindfolded

And then he had to wait for his surprise!

I don't think he was expecting this python!

Kim, at Exotic Pets, was awesome! She did such a great job of educating everyone about the many reptiles that she brought, as well as handling them well. She was so patient when it came to letting the kids handle the animals, but made sure everyone was safe, animals, as well as humans!

I told them I was about to drop the snake!

This boy isn't afraid to hold anything! And yes, that scorpion has its stinger!

No matter how big!

This one was absolutely terrified, but you have to give her credit for trying to overcome her terror! Doesn't she look brave?

There was even a kissing iguana!

And chocolate covered mealworms…she wasn't afraid to eat them, either!

I am pretty sure my son was surprised at his party. In addition to the animals, he had numerous friends show up, as well as family. There were special video's made just for him and lots of laughter to go around.

Jun 08 2009

Summer Swimming!

So we decided to go out and have some summer…and relax. Yes, you heard me…I was bound and determined to relax today. After I dropped off my nephew at school, I grabbed B-boo, the Smart One, the Drama Queen and headed over to pick up my sister-in-law and her children for a day of cousins and swimming. So we headed over to the Sandlot Pool….well, that's what we call it anyway.

Our city is known for it's great pools…small pools with amazing slides and such….the kind everyone wants to go to. Which is why we avoid them like the plague! Instead, we head over to our neighborhood pool with the high dive and for the most part, no little kids. The lifeguards are great and know most of the kids by their names. Bound and determined to relax, we even drew an imaginary line…and once it was crossed over, no negative thoughts were allowed. You see, my sister-in-law and I have one thing in common; we've both extended our families to include children not born directly from us. We're part of, or have been part of, that thing which we call, *the system*. And honestly, sometimes it isn't a lot of fun. And you can't relax. And it doesnt' seem like it will ever end. And you can't relax. It's exhausting. And it's hard to relax. Did I mention we went to relax?

So, we drew that line and we headed on in!

and I remembered my camera this time!

And we swam laps. Lots of them. Really. A whole bunch of them. So many that I am exhausted. It was a great day, it really was. Well worth it. But I don't think laps count as relaxing, do they? I'll probably need to relax tomorrow, because I don't think I'll be able to move much!

Jun 07 2009

Photoless Moments

I did not even take one picture this weekend. And that’s a shame…because I had so many photo opportunities!

There was the Josh Stevens Foundation event. Isa rode a pony. We rode a train. We had ice cream, snow cones and hot dogs. There was a balloon release. There were smiles and tears. I did not take a capture a single moment.

There was our youth summer kick-off party. Lots of photo moments. Forgot to bring my camera in. And you know what’s worse? I made my poor husband find it and bring it to me. My bad. I did get to visit and ate an amazing chili dog!

There was the dog climbing up on the outside table and trying to get in through the window. Definitely a photo moment, but I was still mad at her for breaking into the house and invading the trash.

There was my youngest daughter singing in church this morning. “The Wise Man Builds His House Upon the Rock”….Nope, didn’t capture that one either. My husband managed to record it on video though. He’s such a good man.

I’m a photo nerd. I love to take pictures. I have tons and tons of them. Really, I do. But, I was a total slacker this weekend. I hope my memory stays in tact if I’m going to start missing my photo opportunities!

At any rate, here’s the photo moment my husband managed to capture!