Family - It's a Vivas Thing!

Nov 21 2015

Facing the Future

This post is about change. About looking forward to the future.

Our family has gone thru quite a bit of change over the past several months. Change we never expected. Change we didn’t see coming. But…isn’t that what life is about?

My kids are amazing. I have seen them grown in so many ways. We are all a work in progress, but sometimes change forces you to look at life differently; look at yourself differently, and then you have to choose how you will embrace it and move forward.

Sometimes, you have to take a hard look at yourself and ask, “Who am I?”

I’m not sure; but I know I have more courage these days.

So one day, we were at the kitchen table and we were talking about stuff. The Vivas Table Conversation is one that keeps us laughing. We never know where we will end up, but oh…if you only knew… 😆

Anyway, I mentioned that I’d like to get a little butterfly/dragonfly tattoo on the inside of my right wrist. I wanted them to look like they were dancing towards the future. (Proverbs 31:25; my new life verse). Over the next several weeks, B-boo helped me work with an artist to get the tattoo just right. He knew I like purple and what I was after. His design was perfect! Except, it would not fit on my wrist. It needed to be an ankle tattoo.

Proverbs 21:35 states:

She is clothes with Strength and Dignity;

and Laughs without Fear of the Future.

Strength

mental power, force, or vigor. power of resisting force, strain, wear, etc.

Dignity

a sense of pride in oneself; self-respect. a composed or serious manner

Future

likely to happen or exist.

Butterfly

To Christianity, the butterfly was a symbol of the soul; of resurrection. They are able to change to carry on life. They are adaptable. They have the ability to fly. They represent endurance, change, hope, and life.

Dragonfly

The Dragonfly is able to show itself in different colors. Iridescent. It symbolizes the ability to live life. To live in the moment.

And so… the moment arrived and I walked in with my daughter and her best friend. They were their to support me. 🙂 And when I saw the beautiful design….I realized the little paper I thought he was drawing on was actually an 8X10! I balked…but I REALLY loved the design. I had a choice to make….the tattoo that symbolized exactly what I wanted, colors and detail that fit perfectly; a tattoo that represented my life; our family…or, a little tattoo inside my wrist.

And so, 5 1/2 hours later….

So much for my little wrist tattoo. 😀

Aug 16 2015

What I learned this summer…

As summer comes to an end and we prepare for the new year, I have spent time reflecting on the season that is passing as we move forward into the new season that is looming ahead of us.

This summer is not one that I expected. It was full of trials and tribulations everywhere we turned. But what could I take away from it?

I’ve learned I can’t fix everything. Mother’s are born with an innate desire to fix things. A child gets a boo boo and we blow away the pain, put a pretty bandaid on it and kiss it until it’s better. But as they get older, it gets harder. And eventually, we learn the hard way; we just can’t fix everything. Some things have to be worked out on their own, in His timing, in His way. And I have to stay out of the way.

I’ve learned I can’t control everything. Some things are just beyond my control. ‘Nuff said.

I’ve learned I am not as strong as I thought I was. This has been a hard lesson. I have learned more about myself this summer than I ever thought possible. And being strong; not so much. I’m a mess. My strength is not my own. “I can do all things thru Him who strengthens me.” Phil 4:13

I’ve learned I am stronger than I thought I was. When at my darkest, a light continues to show up. Light thru my children. Light thru my sisters. Light thru a simple text at the right moment. Light thru a memory I’d forgotten about that suddenly pops to my mind.

I’ve learned sisterhood is nothing to be messed with and everything to depend on. Sisterhood has shown up in a way I’ve never experienced before. As an only girl, I did not grow up with sisters. But that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. I could write a blog on this subject alone! Lifelong friendships have surfaced in a way I never dreamed of this summer. When put to the test, sisters, whether cousins, in-laws, or friends for life…they form a bond that cannot be broken. No matter the time or place, they will be there. No matter how crazy we become, they will be there. No matter how rational, irrational, happy, sad, joy, anger, grief, laughter….there is a bond there that cannot be broken. I’ve learned I am not alone; He has placed amazing women in my life in the name of sisterhood. We are sisters…and together we are strong; a cord that cannot be broken.

I’ve learned to let go and let be. Relax or go crazy. Laugh in the face of adversity.

This summer was not as I thought it would be. But, there are moments I will treasure. Conversations in the car with my daughters. Breakthrough moments on the back porch with my sons. “Talk me down” moments with my sisters and inside hee haw jokes that will never go away.

But the biggest lesson I learned this summer was this…

It’s ok to be me. I didn’t know that. I’ve spent much of the later half of my life striving to be what others have told me I have to be…or what I could never be. And the truth is, as long as I live my life with integrity, honesty, mercy, love and compassion, as long as I live my life for Him, I’m ok.

My Tia Gloria shared this with me shortly before she lost her battle to cancer. There was more, but I’ll share just a piece. It has stuck with me, like an imprint on my heart that cannot be removed.

“Mija..you do not need to be what others are telling you to be. Don’t listen to them. The only one that you need to live for is Jesus. And Jesus loves you and accepts you for who you are.”

I didn’t know that would be my last conversation with her, but I hold onto it closely.

A new season starts next week as we go back to school and move into Fall; my favorite season of the year. I’ve yet another son who will begin his journey into adulthood as he starts college. Another who moves on to middle school.

My children; not so little anymore. They’re getting older. They’re growing up. And they continue to surprise me each and every day. They inspire me to be better. To laugh. To love. To be me.

Jun 10 2015

Counting Blessings One by One

As I sit here this evening reflecting on blessings that have come and gone, I can’t help but think over the past month. In the past month, I have been able to spend time with family on an amazing family reunion…

We’ve celebrated our 4th child graduating from high school…

We’ve celebrated our youngest son’s birthday…

We’re about to celebrate another son’s birthday, and soon our oldest daughter will be getting married! I’ve gained some pretty amazing relationships that have gotten me (us) thru some pretty tough times. Life is good. It’s good because I can see the blessings…and I can count them one by one. And I’m so very thankful for those that He has chosen to put in my path, in my life, in my heart. Even more thankful, that He has placed me in theirs.

May 06 2015

Sometimes…

Sometimes, we are so busy running to something else, we don’t realize that we already have the best thing that ever happened to us. We are so afraid of losing control, that we risk losing all that is good in our life. We run blindly towards something else, not even realizing that it will cause us more hurt, more damage.

We are so afraid, we hurt those who love us the most, including ourselves.

We seek out those who will tell us what we want to hear; those whose motives are for themselves, not our best interests.

Sometimes, we make bad choices.

Sometimes, we are so focused on the negative, we can’t even begin to see the beauty of what we have.

But sometimes, we stop.

Sometimes we listen.

Sometimes we discover we are capable of more than we ever thought possible.

Sometimes, we discover love.

Sometimes, we see the beauty in everything that we already have.

Sometimes…

Apr 04 2015

Things that make me go…..hmmmmm

So the Smart One and I went shopping yesterday. We’re gearing up for Easter and needed some stuff.

Actually, we haven’t been shopping in a while and since we were out of napkins, toilet paper, paper towels, laundry soap, etc….like LITERALLY out of them, we decided we had no choice but to go to wally-world.

It started out pretty good until we got to the section where you purchase things to help you wash your clothes AND make them smell good.

And herein lies the problem…

They have apparently discontinued the brand of laundry soap that we use. I’m not sure if it’s just wally world that discontinued it, or the world as we know it, but…it means I either run around looking for it, or I find myself another soap. This kind of sucks since the Drama Queen has allergies and seems to be having a relapse of skin sensitivity right now, so…

…I start to look for a new soap.

And then I realize that not only has my soap been discontinued, but apparently they are also no longer carrying the Bounce bar! I love that thing!

Now I’m faced with another dilemma…do I run around now looking for soap and a dryer thingy, or do I just face the fact that I need to re-think the way I do laundry?

And this is where it leads into a lengthy discussion in the laundry aisle of wally world…

Why, oh why, can’t the manufacturer of laundry soap ALSO be the manufacturer of dryer sheets and fabric softener?

I mean, if that were the case, the laundry soap would have the SAME SCENT as the dryer sheet, right? Wouldn’t it make sense to purchase the soap and sheets of the same brand and same smell?

Because really….I just want it to smell pretty and fresh.

So, I after a lot of discussion and debate on this subject with my son, we finally decided on the following:

Tide Spring Meadow and Snuggle Blue Iris. We’re hoping they are somewhat similar so that we don’t end up with our clothes smelling weird.